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07 April 2015

Keeping Up. How do you manage?

About to get personal here, sorry. I will try to keep it short. 

Social Media. Love it and hate it. Recently something happened on Facebook. I am sure it has happened to many of us. Out of no where, someone I cared about deleted me. Nothing had happened, nothing I posted would have offended her, just random. We've been friends for over a decade, through some serious stuff. Marriages, a whole bunch of kids, divorce. I couldn't image what in the world I did to bring this about. I still don't know. But being the over thinker that I am on top of being awake so many hours at night, it was just getting to me! I started thinking maybe I am just a really crappy friend!

And here I am STILL wondering if that is it, which leads me to wonder, how do we keep up with friends? Having 4 kids makes me feel like the luckiest taxi driver most weeks. Where in this crazy schedule that we have do I make time for friendships? Maybe it's part of my over thinking thing, but I rarely call friends because chances are they will have to repeat themselves multiple times or the baby will start crying or my phone battery will die. I talk myself out of calling people because of those reasons, and others. I try and text friends, but that seems so impersonal and I often will get a text while I am in the middle of something and forget to respond and then it just feels awkward responding to something 2 days later.

**Now don't get me wrong, I am not complaining about the schedule. I know we have made it for ourselves and while this season is our very busiest, it is just a season. I know there are plenty of parents who say NO to sports and activities while their kids are young. That just isn't us.

So I am wondering, how do you do it? How do you make time for friendships, what do you sacrifice? What do you do? Just stop by friends house, always meet somewhere specific and kid friendly? Grocery shop together? Only hang out when you are kid free?

 And please tell me I am not the only one who hesitates to make plans when I know it would work, time wise? I think I talk myself out of initiating time with friends because of silly things like: who knows if I will be able to shower and get dressed that morning on time. What if I look like the hot mess I feel like? Or a big one for me is worrying the baby will spit up, he does this a lot and pretty much every time he eats, what if it gets on their couch/carpet/at a restaurant? These are just 2 of the more common reasons I talk myself out of doing things.  Am I the only one with this much crazy in my head about seeing friends for coffee? Friends I know would never be mad or upset if a baby spit up on their couch?
Maybe you are more like me? What keeps you from hanging with your friends?

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